Life is teaching me that forgiveness is not about the other person, it is about restoring myself to a place of peace. Until I forgive, I allow the other persons slings and arrows to reside in my brain, rent free.
I know what hatred, anger, spite, vengeance, fear, and indignation are about and I know how it feels when any of them lodge in my being. These are states of mind that I cannot afford to entertain. They are like a thief in the night who comes in and takes what it wants while leaving me in a state of despair and need.
There was a time when I could live with darkness, I could carry it around for a while and blame others for what it did to me. But that was then and this is now. Today I forgive myself for even thinking of entertaining the darkness and fling it off like a wet robe. Today I choose to walk in light and in forgiveness. Today I am free.